The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership!

Hey champions, Estela and I are very excited, as John Maxwell certified speakers and trainers to be gearing up to start masterminding John’s 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership soon.

This course is the launch pad for anyone who wants to get serious (that is, showing an intent to succeed) about developing their leadership ability both personally as well as professionally!

For anyone who is based in Cape Town, South Africa and keen to hear more about this incredible opportunity please fill in the contact form below and we will get back to you

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Sticks & Stones..!

Hate MailSo, it’s the beginning of a new year and a new season in mine and Estela’s lives…

As you champions already know, we have recently just moved back to Cape Town, South Africa. My home-town and the most beautiful city in the world and man has it been an adventure! From jumping through all the right hoops with emigration and chasing after the right visa’s, to staying with friends kind enough to host us until we can find a decent place of our own to call home (Dec/Jan is definitely not the right time of year to look for a place to stay!!! Hahaha.)

Anyway, I would like to say that moving home has been all moonlight and roses… however I would be lying… yes it has had been adventure, excitement and victories and memories, however, as with any new venture or endevour worth experiencing… there have been challenges as well.

So, where was I? Oh yes, challenges??? I received my very first (and I am sure not last,) piece of ‘hate-mail’ via email this weekend past… and yes I am not over-exaggerating when I use the word ‘hate’. Upon reading it, I could practically smell the poison dripping from the text. It was not meant to be constructive and it certainly communicated in no uncertain terms what this ‘fan’ (Hahaha) of mine thought of me!

Without mentioning any names or shaming the person by exposing what was said, I am just going to say that this particular person gave me advice and upon examining it, I decided not to take it (partly because some of it was illegal and also partly because I did not think the rest would benefit me long-term.)

Whoever 1st said, ‘stick and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me’ must have been delusional or just not human. The fact is, words do hurt, they are very powerful tools that can be used to build up… or destructive weapons that can be used to tear down.

So how did I react?

At first, as would be expected from any normal, homo-sapien with a heart beat… I was hurt and taken a back. I started asking questions like, “how dare they?” “Do they have any clue..?” I initially felt helpless and like a victim. (Never, judge your strength or your ability to bounce back by your initial reaction. We are all human and we all have a heart and feelings…) However I went to bed and the next morning I started asking a whole different series of questions:

I first asked myself, what of what this person had said was true… what could I change (attitudes, thoughts or habits) from this feedback [no matter how vindictive or malicious.] There is always something to take away from any conversation and to miss this would be to miss an opportunity of growth.

I then reminded myself that hurting people, hurt people and so I began the process of trying to step out of my shoes and into their shoes! It’s amazing what insights you can have, about an argument or person, when you get out of your own way and see things through some body else’s point of view.

I am not saying ignore or excuse the other person or their behavior, however I am saying forgive! You cannot be responsible for people and their reactions, but I have learned… that I am MOST CERTAINLY responsible for my reactions and how I act in response to them!

“UNFORGIVENESS is like drinking POISON…

& HOPING that the other person dies!”

Margaret Stunt

Just a thought 😉

Your fellow hero and friends…

Wez & Estela

Posted in Coaching, Failure, Leadership, Life, Westley Sorgente | Tagged , , ,

Interesting post regarding the state of colleges in the US; could our varsities here in South Africa be heading in the same direction?

When questioned, about 80% of all grade 10/11 high school students I speak to have (and I quote,) “no clue” what they want to study! Is it any wonder then why our adolescents go to varsity and do not apply themselves?

Ideas

A fair amount of schadenfreude greeted the release last week of a study showing that the kids of parents who pay for college return their families’ largesse by achieving lower grades. The study, conducted by University of California at Merced professor Laura Hamilton and published in the American Sociological Review, offered those of us who worked our way through college — or took out burdensome student loans — a rare opportunity to gloat. But our self-congratulation is mistaken, or at least beside the point. Hamilton’s work, and that of other researchers, demonstrates that we should all be concerned about the state of higher education in the U.S. today and that college students enjoying a four-year paid vacation courtesy of their parents are merely a symptom of a larger problem.

That problem is this: across the board, American colleges and universities are not doing a very good job of preparing…

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What I do…

I make your way clearly visible

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2 Steps 4ward… 3 Steps Back!

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It’s amazing how society has been conditioned into believing the idea that it is possible to get something for nothing! You just need look at the infomercials on TV and you will be bombarded with commercials and programs… it was only the other day that I saw one promising to give me incredible Abs in just 6 weeks by plugging a gadget to myself and electrically stimulating me while I watch TV.

You only need look at technology to see that our society as a whole has become lazy and impatient when it comes to processes. We rather want to microwave than grill, we prefer to take-away rather than sit in and we even prefer listening and watching movies and programs than reading a good old book!

WE WANT IT… AND WE WANT IT NOW!

Yes, as a whole… in most cases this is convenient and better for us in the short run, however when we consider the long-term losses as opposed to the gains… are they worth it?

The US leads the way for the most fast food shops and drive-through’s in the world… as well as high blood pressure and heart disease! The microwave is faster yes… but scientifically been proven to neutralize most of the nourishing constituents in the food. And yes watching movies and listening to audio because we can just lay and absorb seems to be fun and relaxing, yet because it requires no effort or imagination… we as a society are systematically numbing our children and conditioning them to lay there and absorb. As a consequence our children seem to put their noses up in the air or get their backs up for anything requiring work, effort or sweat.

When asked to come up with a definition for life, a bunch of psychologists and philosophers came up with one conclusion:

“Life is Stress!”

For anyone with air still in their lungs to expect anything different would truthfully be ridiculous. Life is a process. It is a series of ups and downs, bends and even holes or breaks in the road along the way.

The consequence of society conditioning us to desire, want and need things RIGHT NOW, is that we lose our appreciation for processes. Most valuable things in life are gained only through processes. Kids nowadays expect to leave school and walk straight into a high paying executive position on a board of directors or something just because they have a paper to say they studied for 4 or more years.

Getting life right is a process. Change and success do not just happen, we have to work for it, plan for it and then via a systematic process tweak our attempts to get it. We have been conditioned to expect that life should welcome us with open arms and just spit out riches and opportunities… and so when life kicks us in the teeth, we are surprised.

Suicide rates are higher than ever before! Depression has skyrocketed among teens and society as a whole has flat-lined emotionally!

Champion… life is not easy. There is no short cut and anyone who tells you otherwise is deceiving you! It is only by embracing this truth with arms wide-open that we as a person can condition ourselves and our minds to overcome!

If you expect that it is not going to be a walk in the park, if you expect hiccups… then you plan accordingly and when disappointment comes, you suffer the initial shock, but then you pick yourself up, shake yourself off and then get up and carry on carrying on.

I love what my mentor John Maxwell says about failure:

“The difference between an average person and an achieving person is their perception of, and attitude towards failure!” 

Dr John C. Maxwell from his book ‘Failing Forward.’

Just a thought 😉

Your fellow heroes and buds…

Wez & Estela

Posted in Change management, Coaching, Failure, Life, Paying the Price, Purpose, Subconscious, Westley Sorgente, Youth | Tagged , , , , , ,

The POWER of the Dream!

Doing What Others Say You Cannot

I have been quite fortunate in that I have always had a sense of what I wanted to do with my life, ever since I was about 15 years old. I also inherently knew deep-down inside that if I was not pro-active in striving to reach my dream… it was not going to happen!

Case in point: At Harvard, an interesting study was done from a selection of 1500 students studying there. 750 of which had a plan to study to make a career, earn lots of money and then once they had made their million… finally pursue their dreams, and the remaining 750 were studying with the intention to pursue their dreams believing that if they pursued their dreams… the money would follow.

They tracked the students for a number of years and after 25 years, they followed up with all 1500 students to see how their plans had panned out…

…the discovery they made was staggering! From the total group of 1500, there were 101 millionaires. Of all the millionaires only 1 of them was from the first group (who decided to study in order to pursue a career to chase the money.) The rest of the millionaires all came from the group who prioritized their dreams!

Below I have listed 5 Powerful reasons why it is essential to have a dream and then pursue it:

  1. Amazing things happen when we place faith and have hope in something! My favorite book says, ‘Hope deferred makes the heart sick.’ There is an energy and a passion in life that can only come from pursuing something meaningful and dear to you.
  2. It defines those things which are special from those things which are sacred. An athlete who has their eyes on becoming an elite Olympian will gladly give up a nice large piece of chocolate cake and a late night out with friends (things which seem very appetizing and attractive to most of us,) in exchange for an extra portion of energy the following day.
  3. When our back is up against the WALL… the dream has the ability to pull a person through! History is filled with success stories of people who pushed on when many people gave up. Did you know that Thomas Edison was not the only man working on the incandescent light bulb at the time, nor did he discover the light bulb? No, there were many people who had come up with designs and prototypes for the light bulb, Thomas simply took the existing concept and worked and worked and experimented (over 1000 failed experiments) until he could patent a working design for a low-cost incandescent light-bulb to market to the public.
  4. If you are going to trade your life for money… why not let it be doing something you are passionate about and enjoy. The majority of people aged 30-45 years old which I know, have gotten to a point in life, where if they have not made a conscious deliberate effort to pursue their dream, now find themselves at a point in their life where they look at themselves in the mirror and ask themselves, “How did I get here and do I really want to do what I am doing for the rest of my life?”
  5. Because it is YOUR dream… and as such is uniquely crafted around your passions, talents and bent!

Having a dream is a very powerful resource and if pursued correctly will prove to be one of the most exciting and life-changing decisions you could make!

Just a thought 😉

Your fellow heroes and buds…

Wez and Estela

Posted in Coaching, Dreams, Goal setting, Leadership, Life, Purpose, Westley Sorgente | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Very interesting and thought provoking article on learning and the best techniques to use!

Ideas

In a world as fast-changing and full of information as our own, every one of us — from schoolchildren to college students to working adults — needs to know how to learn well. Yet evidence suggests that most of us don’t use the learning techniques that science has proved most effective. Worse, research finds that learning strategies we do commonly employ, like rereading and highlighting, are among the least effective.

(MORE:How to Use Technology to Make You Smarter)

The scientific literature evaluating these techniques stretches back decades and across thousands of articles. It’s far too extensive and complex for the average parent, teacher or employer to sift through. Fortunately, a team of five leading psychologists have now done the job for us. In a comprehensive report released on Jan. 9 by the Association for Psychological Science, the authors, led by Kent State University professor John Dunlosky, closely…

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